To a dear friend...

♪ You will find that life is still worthwhile

If you just smile ♪

- Charlie Chaplin -

The Japanese Guy and the arranged marriage

So I had 口语课 (speaking class) this afternoon and our teacher divided our class into 2 sides: they who oppose arranged marriage (by parents) and they who support it . There were 12 of us attending the class (the rest of the classmates skipped class) and unfortunately among 12 of us there were only 1 person who support arranged marriage. He was a 62-years- old Japanese guy. The teacher asked me and 4 other classmates, to support him during the debate, even though none of us actually support his opinion. The teacher gave us 15 minutes of preparation and then we have to speak out and explain our opinions concerning which side we were supporting.

During the preparation, the six of us exchanged our thoughts, and 5 of us ended up opposing the Japanese guy's opinion. Jennifer, an American friend of mine, even bluntly expressed her thoughts. That no one should be bounded my marriage with someone that they did not choose themselves.
The debate started, and the opposing team made it clear: that arranged marriage is absurd. Marriage is a very important matter and everybody should be allowed to choose whoever they want to get married with. The Japanese guy told us all that we're still too young to understand. While parents definitely want the best spouse for their children, they also have more experience in life, better 想法 (way of thinking) and 看法 （the way you see the world), to choose the right person. Sparks of love, which seemed to be what we, young generation seek after, will only last for a while. And he said that most of us only choose our spouses based on they physical appearance. The opposing team strongly disagreed and said that nowadays we prioritize 性格 (personality). And what if we simply doesn't like and comfortable with the person our parents chose for us? We will be the one who get married and we should be the one who choose and decide.
The Japanese guy then told us that we're too young to decide based on such idealistic reasons. He said that we are all students, 有很多空(have a lot of free time). But if we start to work, we won't have the time to get to know our future spouses. Even on weekends. The opposing team replied that if we simply don't have the time, then don't try to find a spouse. Because it won't be fair to our future spouse, not being able to spare some time for him/ her.
The Japanese guy continued with his reasons. He said that statistic place the divorce rate for arranged marriages much lower than marriages out of love. The opposing team replied that the pressure a married couple encounters from both society as a whole, and from respective families, suggests that divorce is not an option. Moreover, arranged or not, divorces occur because of problems between the husband and wife.

It was an interesting afternoon. And now I have to write an essay for the 读写 (grammar) class. Tomorrow will be the last school day for the week anyway, with the school field trip on Thursday& Friday! :)

The Closet #1

top& shorts: Zara
necklace: a gift from K in Stratsbourgh
black legging: no brand, bought it at the store in front of my current school
white flat shoes: Esprit
black leather bag& ring: H& M

* please forgive the messy background :p

I wish there are more men like him

"Kuburan perempuan telah terbangun di sepanjang kehidupan ketika rasa malu tidak tertahankan dan rasa kotor tidak terbersihkan; ketika tubuh dan kesadaran manusia hidup tidak cukup menanggung penderitaan yang dialami jiwa dan raga.."

alm. Pramoedya Ananta Toer.
A wonderful man, a more wonderful writer, and a male feminist.

他喝醉了！

i我:
莘银福， 你没事吗？ 身体好吗？

他：
哈哈哈～ 没事 ………… 问一下， 为了我的行为所以昨天发生什么事情了吗？

我：
哈哈哈。。 没有什么事情。。 别担心吧。。。 你今天好好休息, 好吧？

他：
托你的福， 我来中国以后初次喝醉 哈哈哈还有你们四个人真的谢谢 ^^ 再见～

我：
不用谢。。 昨天晚上是应该的！：）

Been craving for it for a while now..

and I finally decided to eat it at the usual place- Starbucks! LOL- Irene will be dissapointed hearing this. It's hard to find a local coffee shop who serves a slice of creamy, smooth, rich, and dense new york cheese cake (in short the best cheese cake)here in Shanghai..

The dry season has arrived!

It's almost November here in Shanghai, where I have been staying for approx. 9 months to learn Mandarin Language. It's the fall season already with winter coming in just a pinch of time. This only means one thing: it's the dry skin season! We all know the feeling: dry, raw, itchy dry skin that seems to return every fall and winter.

So, despite of the rip-off prices here at Sephora and Sasa, I finally repurchased my ultimate weapons to fight this season: Clinique Dramatically Different Moisturizing Gel (460 RMB at Sephora) and Jergens Shea Butter Lotion (79.8 RMB at Sasa). Thanks to them, no more dry skin for me!!



*tips for using your moisturizer: use it right after you shower (you have to shower with warm water, not hot water. by then your skin will still be damp and moist, and the moisturizer helps lock in the moisture from your shower.